Retired confessions

Retiring: "Sometimes I fake emotions. I wonder if they can tell."


Admitting: "I have no plan. I honestly thought life would end before this."

Here is the Mandate

Yesterday I gave a presentation on John Nash. Apparently he was hired at MIT (not his first choice) back when MIT was not considered such a great research institution. The point being.... MIT later WAS considered a great research institution. When did it make the switch? Maybe MIT was already great back when Nash was just being brought into the fold. MIT's lack of a name didn't prevent it from doing great work, or from being better than other places. Public opinion caught up later.

I've been thinking a lot about brand names, specifically of how going to a great school or being affiliated with an accomplished person or being part of a famous organization really doesn't actual signal anything about your own achievements. I know this is a deeply true fact... having worked for a big named place because it was big named and having it fall really really short. I know this to be true, having found great art and people and academics in the strangest of places.

Right now, I am sitting in the Midwest, about to start my research. My advisor, my schools past and present, my professors, my family, my last name have no say here. It's just me and the Math. I hope and fear that I will be judged by my accomplishments.


I must achieve.

I have a PhD committee!!

I am getting my masters is Mathematics on May 4th. I can't believe it. Yet I look forward.... I am here for a PhD after all. I just got an advisor - a total badass - and a PhD committee. After June I'll be done with all my exams and will start REEEESSSEEEEAAAARRRCH!

I'm excited that I will never have to really care about homework or exams for the rest of my life. I'm terrified that from now on I will be expected to produce original Mathematics. Thus will pass the next 4 years of my life.

Baby

My friend, whom I visited in Malaysia last summer... just had a beautiful baby girl. She had been been about 2 weeks pregnant when I was there. It's so great, because, she has a back injury and wondered even back when we were in high school together, whether she could ever carry a child to term without permanently paralysing herself... or worse.

Blessing.